I am sick of stupid girls

Elementary education classes have become increasingly upsetting lately and this time it was Math. The problem is that many elementary education majors don't know when to keep their mouth shut.

Apparently most of them missed the theme of Proverbs: If you're a fool, keep your mouth shut and no one will know.

This particular class period, a few different people were assigned to practice their lesson plans while the remaining class played the part of the students. The girl that was teaching us about the metric system today looked shy and not very confident. Immediately, I felt bad for this girl and decided I would be a respectful student by answering her questions and following her directions.

As she started off, stuttering and talking in an extremely quiet voice, I leaned in and listened very carefully. I was disturbed within seconds as the girl next to me began frantically fumbling with her candy wrapper in order to satisfy her enormous sugar craving. This small disturbance created a waterfall of disaster. Girls, pretending to be 5th graders, started talking back and forth while the teacher was trying to explain inches. Being the only boy in the class, I was up in arms. There was nothing I could do to control this mess of chatting...

"Unless…" I said to myself with a grin.
"Quick girls! There's a 3rd grader in the hallway looking to give away donuts and he has a cute older brother who is looking for a wife!!"

I knew their secret. I have been engulfed in their lives for the last three years—waiting, watching, and memorizing their wants and desires. I knew the three weakness (in no particular order) of all Elementary Ed girls:

1. Kids
2. Food
3. Getting their MRS degree


Needless to say, all the girls ran for the 3rd grader with the donuts and the older brother, found nothing and said, "Oh John, you're so funny."

So if you are looking for a career and/or a mate, you have three choices: Calvin, Trinity, or Dordt. And as quickly as possible, find the elementary education program.